i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize