WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
