OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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