I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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