its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize