Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
