Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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