If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
