I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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