dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
