I don't think brook has ever known best
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
