I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
