No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
