My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
