There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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