I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so let's talk penis.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize