I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
