you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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