apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
