I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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