belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Randomize
