Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
