It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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