okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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