no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize