it hurts more in the daytime
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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