I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
