He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Randomize
