i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize