the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
