What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
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