He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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