so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
