some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
