You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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