i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
