Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
