As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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