Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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