Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
