I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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