i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
