What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
