Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize