Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
