omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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