I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
