She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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