The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Come see our sink grown plant.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize