bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
