I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
